Help me understand at what point in life do the games stop? I'm 33 years old and I'm tired of crap. I'm not perfect, kinda perfect or remotely perfect but I do my best to be a good person and consider others feelings. Now having said that I also reach a point where saying a giant F U feels good and I'm there.
I'm tired of feeling like I'm crazy because of others bipolar behavior. It messes with my head and its just plain odd ya know. Its not suppose to be this way at this stage in the game of life is it?
Let me tell you what else I'm sick of - TEXT MESSAGES. They can be so great and so - ugh annoying. Being mad at someone is way easier than it used to be. If you're pissed you don't respond. When your un-pissed you can cop out with the 'oh I didn't get your text.' or my favorite 'i've been really busy.' We have come to a place in this world where live communication is almost non-existent. Talking things out doesn't happen but sending 325 text messages that could be settled in a 5 minute call is how things fly. This is so dumb and it gives the weak and heartless the easy road and I've worked too hard to be a strong person to let this continue.
Sure lets text 'I'll met you at the park in 5' or 'I'm picking up dinner what sounds good?' But 'I don't have Breast Cancer' - not text appropriate or 'his wife was killed' HIGHLY inappropriate and YES I've received both in a text message!!!!!!!! Its coming to the point we will find out we've been fired via Blackberry Messenger!
And dear God what is this doing to our children - the future of the world? They aren't going to know how to even ask a girl out on a date. They won't know the feeling of rejection that isn't followed by a stupid ass smiley face or wink to cushion the blow!
I am trying to raise two future men and beautiful woman and I wish I could just take them back to 1980 and let them live there.
Wow - a post about being pissed at a person has turned into Alex against technology. Which is pretty hypocritical while I sit on my Mac and type in a online diary.
Whatever I don't care but do me a favor - Call me if you are mad or annoyed or wake up and boom have a different personality! Can you let me know that? Cuz you can't call me crazy if you are the one making me nuts!
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Practicality - should be a Four letter word!
Roger and I have been talking about getting rid of the Volvo and getting a bigger car. I hate to sound like a stuck up American but its just not big enough once all three kids and bikes and scooters and beach toys and such are in - well...they just all don't fit.
And because Roger and I have moments of illogical thoughts we said Let's get an Escalade. And then we said - No Lets get the Escalade ESV - the one that has the full third row and still extra room for my double stroller. Who the F do I think I am and am I made of money????? Although to be honest we found some used ones online for a really nice price. So very long story short I went to test drive the Suburban just to see if I could even drive something that size and I seemed to be able to. Then I thought and thought and thought and overly thought and obsessively thought about it and snap just like that I said 'this is insane! I don't need an Escalade! I need something more practical and economical and something that doesn't cost $80 to fill up - choke, gasp, cry - a mini van.' Roger said NO! And I'm certainly not anti-mini - I mean I drove one before I had kids and was even married as a company car...they are very handy and practical....there is it.....practical.
So Roger starts throwing out van ideas and I am deciding quickly this was all a bad idea. I should have just shut up and never said anything and I keep saying things like 'no no that's ok - the Volvo is great. We'll just make it work. Its all good.' And I reminded I'm at his mercy with the whole not having a job thing - so I get what I get and Roger is good at buying things and 'surprising' me. I'm starting to panic a bit and thinking of ways to distract him from the topic.....sex...lets talk about sex....or the kids....or yes yes I have it...all the money we will save if we just keep the volvo and forget this whole big car conversation ever happened.....
SOOOOOO....I open my computer today and see this.....just taunting me......
Yeah, you think you are so funny huh Roger...asshole.
I will drive my Volvo and give thanks for what I have :)
And because Roger and I have moments of illogical thoughts we said Let's get an Escalade. And then we said - No Lets get the Escalade ESV - the one that has the full third row and still extra room for my double stroller. Who the F do I think I am and am I made of money????? Although to be honest we found some used ones online for a really nice price. So very long story short I went to test drive the Suburban just to see if I could even drive something that size and I seemed to be able to. Then I thought and thought and thought and overly thought and obsessively thought about it and snap just like that I said 'this is insane! I don't need an Escalade! I need something more practical and economical and something that doesn't cost $80 to fill up - choke, gasp, cry - a mini van.' Roger said NO! And I'm certainly not anti-mini - I mean I drove one before I had kids and was even married as a company car...they are very handy and practical....there is it.....practical.
So Roger starts throwing out van ideas and I am deciding quickly this was all a bad idea. I should have just shut up and never said anything and I keep saying things like 'no no that's ok - the Volvo is great. We'll just make it work. Its all good.' And I reminded I'm at his mercy with the whole not having a job thing - so I get what I get and Roger is good at buying things and 'surprising' me. I'm starting to panic a bit and thinking of ways to distract him from the topic.....sex...lets talk about sex....or the kids....or yes yes I have it...all the money we will save if we just keep the volvo and forget this whole big car conversation ever happened.....
SOOOOOO....I open my computer today and see this.....just taunting me......
 | ||||
| FOR SALE NEW!!!! GMC Savana Extend |
I will drive my Volvo and give thanks for what I have :)
Saturday, February 12, 2011
The Man I Married
Let me introduce you to the real man I married....
He gets out of the shower and walks around with his hands up in the air saying "oh yea. oh yea bitches" while swinging his stuff around in a big circle. Ugh the image.
I bend over to get the dishes out of the dishwasher and my body is thrown forward as he grabs my hips and starts humping me. Actually any time I bend over. Why do men do this? OR is Roger the only one?
If I'm standing and he walks by I can guarantee I'm going to get a smack on the ass.
If I'm sitting at my computer he will jump up on the chair and put one foot on the desk and hump my head! And every thrust requires an "oh yea. Oh yea" and the occasional "you like that?" while grinding his teeth together.
The thing that kills me is I fell in love with this man the second I met him. I knew he was the love of my life - you know how...because he was telling a story about a blow job and a "double fisted twisty" (a what you ask?...you can ask him). Keep in mind I met him at the hospital and this was a work meeting! I had never met someone who made me laugh harder, I was more attracted to and more sexually compatible with!
He is the handiest man and can fix anything!!!!!!!! ANYTHING! I take it for granted that I say "I want a wall here. A light here. A bookshelf here" and he does it. We have a TV I can't work. 3 computers I can't turn on. He is 100 times smarter than I could be. AND FUNNY!!!!!
He is also a grammar Nazi! We spent our Anniversary at the Ojai Valley Inn and Spa (a 5 star resort) and the girl came to take our drink requests at the pool and instead of ordering his strawberry daiquiri with whip cream (thats right - thats what I said) he hands her the menu and says "do you know how many spelling mistakes are on this menu?" Then turns to me like they spit on his meal and said "this is an expensive resort! This is ridiculous!!!! Doesn't anyone proof read this stuff?"
What a giant pain in my ass he is....and I love him extra for it!
He gets out of the shower and walks around with his hands up in the air saying "oh yea. oh yea bitches" while swinging his stuff around in a big circle. Ugh the image.
I bend over to get the dishes out of the dishwasher and my body is thrown forward as he grabs my hips and starts humping me. Actually any time I bend over. Why do men do this? OR is Roger the only one?
If I'm standing and he walks by I can guarantee I'm going to get a smack on the ass.
If I'm sitting at my computer he will jump up on the chair and put one foot on the desk and hump my head! And every thrust requires an "oh yea. Oh yea" and the occasional "you like that?" while grinding his teeth together.
The thing that kills me is I fell in love with this man the second I met him. I knew he was the love of my life - you know how...because he was telling a story about a blow job and a "double fisted twisty" (a what you ask?...you can ask him). Keep in mind I met him at the hospital and this was a work meeting! I had never met someone who made me laugh harder, I was more attracted to and more sexually compatible with!
He is the handiest man and can fix anything!!!!!!!! ANYTHING! I take it for granted that I say "I want a wall here. A light here. A bookshelf here" and he does it. We have a TV I can't work. 3 computers I can't turn on. He is 100 times smarter than I could be. AND FUNNY!!!!!
He is also a grammar Nazi! We spent our Anniversary at the Ojai Valley Inn and Spa (a 5 star resort) and the girl came to take our drink requests at the pool and instead of ordering his strawberry daiquiri with whip cream (thats right - thats what I said) he hands her the menu and says "do you know how many spelling mistakes are on this menu?" Then turns to me like they spit on his meal and said "this is an expensive resort! This is ridiculous!!!! Doesn't anyone proof read this stuff?"
What a giant pain in my ass he is....and I love him extra for it!
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Hello My Name is CRAZY
Well this post is happening faster than I expected. I knew my Father in Law would be a main topic of conversation but I didn't realize on post #2. For those who do not know he is Bat Shit Crazy AND he lives in a seprate area of our house. Roger added it on - he can't get in our place or us his without using the front door but ANY in-laws or even parents that close make you want to put a gun in your mouth...now add crazy as fuck to the mix and Viola you have 8494 Eureka Street!
I am very good at exaggeration but I PROMISE you none of the below is in ANYWAY an exaggeration.
Today is Thursday. I have received 7 texts messages from him, 2 emails, 1 phone call and saw him outside earlier today. What is so important you ask? Ummmmmm not a damn thing. But what did he want to tell you you ask? Ummmmmm well 1 of the 2 page emails was to let me know that he is going to Wisconsin to visit his sister MAY 23 - July 21. Ok no big deal - so noted. Email 2 was also 2 pages and letting me know everything I need to do while he is gone (sidenote - he has no pets, lives in 550 sqft, never leaves the house but to go surf) so what I read was a lot of words that ended up saying 'water my 2 plants' and blah blah blah shuttle to airport, cover for car, blah blah blah and he's not leaving for 3 months!!!!!!!!!!!
The text messages wanted to let me know he sent above mentioned emails and what they were about and also the boys can't come up and play with him because his 'crazy' meds make him constapated so he needs to go to the store to buy product for that and then he'll be "sick". Oh thank you so much for telling me about your ass problems! And I need to also add I get a text a week about something wrong with his ass. Its so gross and so uncalled for and I hate it!
The conversation outside was letting me know he was going to cut the grass and then 2 follow up texts asking 'if now was a good time to cut the grass' and 'don't worry I'll get to the grass in a bit'. I wasn't worried and I don't care about the stupid grass. I have enough to do besides answer my ending 'bing-ing' phone letting me know his butt is bleeding, he walked into a wall, will buy vitamin E for the plants (what?), has a cold, has a headache, has a runny nose, has a cough, has to go to the store, hasn't pooped all week, he has a dr apt, a shrink apt, a VA apt, a chiropractor apt, and might surf at noon...no wait now I won't surf because I'm out of breath from climbing the stairs.
I pray with Sully at night but I don't think I'm qualified for real prayers that actually get heard so if you do pray will you pray for me please because I have to live with this the rest of my life and I'm on the verge of a bloody freak out!
I am very good at exaggeration but I PROMISE you none of the below is in ANYWAY an exaggeration.
Today is Thursday. I have received 7 texts messages from him, 2 emails, 1 phone call and saw him outside earlier today. What is so important you ask? Ummmmmm not a damn thing. But what did he want to tell you you ask? Ummmmmm well 1 of the 2 page emails was to let me know that he is going to Wisconsin to visit his sister MAY 23 - July 21. Ok no big deal - so noted. Email 2 was also 2 pages and letting me know everything I need to do while he is gone (sidenote - he has no pets, lives in 550 sqft, never leaves the house but to go surf) so what I read was a lot of words that ended up saying 'water my 2 plants' and blah blah blah shuttle to airport, cover for car, blah blah blah and he's not leaving for 3 months!!!!!!!!!!!
The text messages wanted to let me know he sent above mentioned emails and what they were about and also the boys can't come up and play with him because his 'crazy' meds make him constapated so he needs to go to the store to buy product for that and then he'll be "sick". Oh thank you so much for telling me about your ass problems! And I need to also add I get a text a week about something wrong with his ass. Its so gross and so uncalled for and I hate it!
The conversation outside was letting me know he was going to cut the grass and then 2 follow up texts asking 'if now was a good time to cut the grass' and 'don't worry I'll get to the grass in a bit'. I wasn't worried and I don't care about the stupid grass. I have enough to do besides answer my ending 'bing-ing' phone letting me know his butt is bleeding, he walked into a wall, will buy vitamin E for the plants (what?), has a cold, has a headache, has a runny nose, has a cough, has to go to the store, hasn't pooped all week, he has a dr apt, a shrink apt, a VA apt, a chiropractor apt, and might surf at noon...no wait now I won't surf because I'm out of breath from climbing the stairs.
I pray with Sully at night but I don't think I'm qualified for real prayers that actually get heard so if you do pray will you pray for me please because I have to live with this the rest of my life and I'm on the verge of a bloody freak out!
Monday, February 7, 2011
Me, Myself and I
Like I've mentioned I've always wanted to write a book and I've started a few times but then after a few pages I think this is the stupidest fucking thing I've ever read and who really gives a shit? So I erase and thats it...I'm not really sure what I'm suppose to write about...the insanely obvious? I guess. How I don't understand this Mom at the boys school that I am on the verge of obsessed with because she is incapable of getting out of her car and walking her children into school by herself! I swear!!!! I have sat in my car and watched her and she pulls up, slowly gets out - constantly looking around - awaiting her other Mom friends to arrive and as soon as one does she hurries to get her kids out and rushes over and LITERALLY stands and waits for her friend to unload. And she does this EVERYDAY!!!!!
I saw her one day at this Indoor Jump place and dear God she was alone and I couldn't resist so I walked over and said 'are you meeting anyone here?' knowing full well she just had to be and sure as shit she mumbled 'yes...mumble mumble mumble'. WTF is being alone that hard for some people. I get all itchy at the thought of even knowing her (and by knowing I mean I smile politely but I have no stinking clue her name or kids names). She bugs me but not in a pissy way - in a obsessed way where I can't stop watching her make an insecure ass of herself. I love it!
I think sometimes I'm a nice person but then I re-read what I just wrote and I think Geez you are such a bitch you better stop writing this because someone is going to read this and you aren't going to look like such a nice person. Oh Well...guess that's OK.
Roger is bloody sick again. I'm staring to wonder if he's really sick or if he has a NyQuil addiction. He talks about NyQuil more than a normal person should. Tonight he took a hot bath and dosed up then crawled in bed, made a few groaning noises and body twitches and hasn't moved since.
I love being married. I love the security and openness and laughter that goes in to it but Holy Shit if you don't have a good sense of humor it's never going to last! After I put the boys down I gave Bridget a quick bath and then got dressed for bed and looked in the mirror - I am currently wearing brown long underwear and a grey long sleeved top - nothing fancy BUT as I was getting dressed and shoving my nasty nursing boobs into a stretched out, ugly ass nursing bra and putting in hot ass breast pads I saw my long underwear pulled up way over my bellybutton which made my ass look like it started in the middle of my back and I walked over to Roger and rubbed up against him and asked if he wanted some of this hot ass! He turned, checked out my outfit which at this time was just the bra and long underwear and said 'ummmm no. I'll pass.' His loss sucka!
I saw her one day at this Indoor Jump place and dear God she was alone and I couldn't resist so I walked over and said 'are you meeting anyone here?' knowing full well she just had to be and sure as shit she mumbled 'yes...mumble mumble mumble'. WTF is being alone that hard for some people. I get all itchy at the thought of even knowing her (and by knowing I mean I smile politely but I have no stinking clue her name or kids names). She bugs me but not in a pissy way - in a obsessed way where I can't stop watching her make an insecure ass of herself. I love it!
I think sometimes I'm a nice person but then I re-read what I just wrote and I think Geez you are such a bitch you better stop writing this because someone is going to read this and you aren't going to look like such a nice person. Oh Well...guess that's OK.
Roger is bloody sick again. I'm staring to wonder if he's really sick or if he has a NyQuil addiction. He talks about NyQuil more than a normal person should. Tonight he took a hot bath and dosed up then crawled in bed, made a few groaning noises and body twitches and hasn't moved since.
I love being married. I love the security and openness and laughter that goes in to it but Holy Shit if you don't have a good sense of humor it's never going to last! After I put the boys down I gave Bridget a quick bath and then got dressed for bed and looked in the mirror - I am currently wearing brown long underwear and a grey long sleeved top - nothing fancy BUT as I was getting dressed and shoving my nasty nursing boobs into a stretched out, ugly ass nursing bra and putting in hot ass breast pads I saw my long underwear pulled up way over my bellybutton which made my ass look like it started in the middle of my back and I walked over to Roger and rubbed up against him and asked if he wanted some of this hot ass! He turned, checked out my outfit which at this time was just the bra and long underwear and said 'ummmm no. I'll pass.' His loss sucka!
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