I was sitting at the park one day a few months back and I was listening to a group of women all bitching about there husbands. And I mean bitching. They were sitting in this tight little circle in the grass just peck peck pecking away and because I am sick and demented and wrong I sat there and wondered "I wonder how many of the 5 of your husbands is having an affair?" How many of them are so sick and tired of your endless nagging they have checked out? As I looked at them all one at a time and eavesdropped on the conversation and pretty much guessed at least 2 - maybe 3 of the 5.
I am obsessed with extramarital relationships. I find them fascinating and thrilling to read about and understand. Why are you doing this? Is something missing? Is something wrong? Is your marriage open? Does anyone know? Are you scared to get caught? But mostly I find the first two questions the most intriguing.
I am a FIRM believer in the fact we are animals and monogamy is ridiculous. JUST RIDICULOUS! Forever is a long fucking time and if you look at things from the animal kingdom and our purpose in life its to spread our seed or grow the seed.
Having said that do I believe monogamy can work - sure. But I bet its far less than any of us realize.
I'm no doctor (even though if I did it all over again I would take this psychology degree and run with it instead of heading into sales. I'd be sitting in my office with a sign outside that read "Dr. Jordan Marriage and Family Counseling").
I watched a documentary a bit ago about this hippie camp north of San Francisco. Its about getting in touch with yourself and your body which for this 'leader' meant orgy's, swapping and everyone being naked all day. It was a bit out there don't get me wrong but one of the things he said that stuck was "we are capable of loving more than one parent. Capable of loving more than one child. Of loving more than one sibling but our hearts are not capable of loving more than one partner?" I had NEVER thought of it like that before. Huh...my heart just closes off to anyone else because I am married or partnered? My pea brain started racing.... That is only fair but not what society accepts.
I've never watched the show Sister Wives but I get the concept and NO ONE can honestly tell me at one point you haven't thought "FUCK YOU ROGER (insert your own husbands name)! You are a toad and I can do this WITHOUT YOU! You damn sperm donor!!!!I have a vibrator so I'm good!" OK...clearly I have. I've thought If I can just get a group of other women together and live it would be great. No men to jack things up and piss me off. No one to tell me I'm doing something wrong or not good enough or just to nag and make messes and be annoying! I'd have built in friends to drink wine with and play games with and watch HGTV and we will skip through the flowers holding hands and singing.
Ok I got off track from the begging even though I'm not sure what the entire point of this was. Ahhh yes....Max Kennedy. Dear Max...dear sweet sweet Max. You are every man (and woman) who I am desperate to understand. I am completely intrigued by you and your sex drive. I want to know what your plan is? Is your goal long term sex? Is it temporary gratification? Do you think you are capable of feelings and will you run if that happens?
For those of you that read the post I later deleted about the oral sex.....THAT was MAX! (I deleted it for a reason so don't say anytihng about it...just remember). In that post I said Max was single....I lied....Max is married - gasp. I doubt Max knows he is my little pet project but he is. I'm sitting back watching and waiting and learning and loving it all.
Max is a good guy - a great guy actually but Max would surprise you all I think. (and no Max is not his real name HENCE 'All names have been changed to protect the guilty.' I am blessed (and I despise that word but really it fits) to be able to be privy to some great stories (like the oral sex) that I can no longer not share. I warn you they are graphic! They are fabulous! And to make them great they must be told in the first person so stick with me - ok. And DO NOT think for a second I don't hate myself daily for deleting the oral sex blog....but if you liked that then you will L O V E what is to come!
